My Boob-Voyage: The Sandman Hates Me

He never sprinkles enough of his magic sleep dust in my eyes. Crappy cancer has chased him away. From the day I found my lump, September 8, I've not slept well. Those first two weeks were because I was scared. . . . . Plus I have a brain that doesn't turn off and is essentially thinking all the time. (Sign of intelligence, you know)

I was thinking constantly about the 'what ifs' as I researched and studied about all forms of breast cancer so that when I got my pathology report I would understand it. (The health industry has their own language)

Once I had the report and an actual date for my surgery, (I kinda freaked out here) my mind went into overdrive to get everything tidied up in a nice neat OCD package. Was there enough food in the house to sustain us while I recover; did I pay all the bills; oh crap, I need to get all the laundry done; and a hundred other details.

Once I came home, sleep alluded me because of the pain and I was just downright miserable. No other way to describe it, mis-er-a-ble! I couldn't get comfortable. I hate sleeping on my back all propped up with 18 pillows. . . . . Well, almost 18. . . . . .but I couldn't lay in any position that didn't hurt.

I suffered during the day and waited to take my pain meds before bed hoping I could get a few hours at least. I took Melatonin. I even resorted to sleeping pills. (Don't worry, I didn't take them all together) I've played meditation music to help me relax. I've read to turn my mind off and help make me sleepy. I'm telling you, the sandman hates me! And lack of sleep makes this girl cranky!

Stupid crappy cancer has stolen my sleep.

Today is day 11. I haven't hurt as bad today. I didn't even take an aspirin. I haven't had any visitors except family but today my BFF drove in to surprise me. We sat outside and got some vitamin D and it felt amazing! We called our gal pal from South Dakota and she was good for a giggle or two. Plus, I walked to the mailbox and back with the hubster and even showered all by myself!

I took off my binding before showering. My chest feels really weird. The swelling is much better and most of the bruising is on the right side. You can see that there's barely an inch between the two incisions and they go all the way around under my arms. That's the worst because there's major nerves and lymph glands that were cut. It's the PITS! (pun intended)