Is there a Doctor in the House?

How many doctors does a girl need to whack off her boobs? I have had an Oncology Radiolist (who found the dumb cancer and did my biopsies) and I have already met with my surgeon. . . . that's the guy who gets the honors of whacking off my boobs. (I'm really thankful that I'm his first surgery of the day on his first day of surgery that week! I certainly hope he gets a good night's sleep and doesn't have any alcohol the night before!) Wonder how many boobs he whacks off in a week? How many of these people are going to feel my boobs? It's getting ridiculous! Oh well, I digress. I'm told I'll also have an Oncologist, Hematologist, Dietician, (NO plastic surgeon) Physical Therapist and of course my Primary Care Doc. . . . .  now all I need is a maid, chef, chauffeur and personal assistant and I'll be all set. And of course, the greatest physician of all, MY LORD!

And let's not forget the Office Manager who keeps telling me what "my portion" of the costs will be. I already dished out over $605 for the stupid painful biopsies! (still have bruising from those) Another procedure next week for "mapping" the lymph nodes and attaching the wires to my tumors (sounds fun, huh?) will cost $340. And I haven't even entered the operating room yet! Somehow, it just doesn't seem fair that they are actually going to charge me to whack these things off!

So, my Mary Kay business is kicking in here: I have full inventory if you need anything! If I can't deliver, my hubster will! And, I've decided that I'm wearing lipstick into the operating room. Yep. I know they'll mess it up with that dumb tube down my throat, but I gotta feel good going in! (Also hoping for some good drugs at this point) 

Yesterday, I bought two breast cancer awareness shirts and I have a pink breast cancer scarf from my parents that I plan to wear as I recover. I'm going to be a survivor and live in PINK! Today, I journaled in my Bible all day and tonight will be an excellent crock pot dinner with my fam and my soul sister (BFF) so I betcha I find those "Big Girl Panties" this weekend. Tomorrow I will watch my grandson play football and rejoice that I'm a NaNa! I want to be done with the negativity. I want to find the positives. . . . . Lord Help Me!Suck it up girl and get a grip!