It's NOT because I'm a woman! (That is a disclaimer for all the men reading this) It's because of the cancer, surgery, recovery and treatment. I've been having huge mood swings similar to PMS. (Some might say worse) One minute I'm happy and the next I'm crabby and rude. I'm also having anxiety and that's a new experience! I couldn't decide if it was because I wasn't getting any sleep, from constant pain, or perhaps a hormonal change from the crappy cancer.
I was afraid I was alienating myself from my loved ones, and hated the way it was making me feel. My precious husband just keeps sticking with me, assuring me of his love no matter what.
After opening up to my support group and doctor, I'm told this is normal. Every single woman I talked to was having the same issue! Great! At least I'm not alone and losing my delightful personality! :)
It's a journey that's not too pleasant with many different side affects. PTSD is not uncommon among cancer patients. I wouldn't go that far, but I was reassured it would get better. I feel like I need to wear a sign around my neck warning people: "This isn't who I am. It's only temporary. "
One woman told me her son made her a sign to hang on her door: "Beware of Grumpy Old Woman." She took that well!
So if I bite your head off or show annoyance, please bear with me and remember it's the crappy cancer and the treatment that's screwing with my body and mind. I'm trying to be cautiously aware of my snippiness. Crappy cancer, I hate you!
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