Lemonade

Life gives us lemons. Lots of lemons! It's life. We all have crappy things that happen to us, but we have to get back up and keep going. We have to live. I have a life to live! I'm not special or unique. I'm not the first person to have crappy cancer and I won't be the last. I understand that this world is not my home, and I've been trying to stay positive and upbeat. So, I'm listening to gospel music, meditating, and thinking about the "after".

I'm going to make lemonade out of this. I feel like God has given me an opportunity here. . . . . . It's important how I deal with it. So, I've been coming up with a list of the positives to have no "girls" on my chest and here's what I've come up with so far:

• I'll never have to wear a bra again, unless I choose to wear prosthesis. (I'm told they are heavy and uncomfortable, so maybe tissue paper?! Ha!) 
• I won't have to try on a hundred of them to find the one that fits the "underarm" boobage and feels comfortable
• I won't "nip" in cold weather ever again!
• I'll never have to worry about hiding my straps (yes, I'm from the generation where underwear is called that for a reason; because it's supposed to be hidden under!)
• I'll be able to sleep on my side more comfortably (eventually after healing)
• I'll never have to get another mammogram (those things hurt!)
• I won't have to remember to do self exams monthly
•  I don't have to worry about too much showing when I bend over
• They won't bounce when I run
• No more sweating under the girls
• I won't have to fear them falling out of my swimsuit when playing in the water
• It will be easier to cast a fishing rod 
• It will be easier to shoot pool
•  It will be easier to cross my arms
• They won't "go south" as I age 

I know myself, and I know that I will have feelings of ugliness, being unfeminine and I don't want to look in the mirror and be reminded of the crappy cancer that took my "girls" without seeing something beautiful. So, I plan to have tattoos over my scars. Yes, I'm making lemonade out of the scars!

I have christian brothers and sisters who are judgemental about tattoos but I find them beautiful. According to Isaiah 49:16, God inscribed His kids' pictures on the palms of His hand. (Yep, God had tattoos!)

Tattoos are personal to the person and tell a story. I have five (yes, 5) and they are each very personal to me. I love them as part of my body. I look forward to healing enough to get a piece of art. . . . . the ink on my breast area will help me let go, move on, and heal. Yes, I will be reminded of my struggle, but the tattoo will also be a good reminder of hope and new life. It will give me more reason to breathe and be happy, thereby speeding up my emotional healing. 

I want to be intimate with my love and feel sexy, and having beautiful art on my chest will give me the confidence I'll need to feel beautiful. Crappy cancer is personal. Tattoos are personal. Don't judge me. I will do what feels right to me and what makes my body and life continue in a way to feel good about myself. That's not selfish. It's making lemonade out of life's lemons.

check out this link: http://www.psfk.com/2014/10/inkspirations-app-links-breast-cancer-survivors-tattoo-artist.html

Ephesians 5:16 tells us to make the best out of a bad situation because the days are evil.